Enabled to Love

 As someone that's abled and can't completely understand the world of those with a condition- I asked my boyfriend for advice for this blog post. Here are some tips on dating for those who have a disability:  Be patient Before I met my boyfriend, I never truly knew what it was like to be dealing with a condition- much less what was acceptable to say or even do. This will most likely be the case for your date too. It's important to try to understand that there's going to be some awkwardness- not necessarily because it's a first date, but also because it's your dates first time interacting with someone with a disability. Try to gauge if they're being genuine. If not- worst case scenario, your first date comes to an end. Be confident Meeting someone for the first time is always at least a little bit awkward. Try to embrace that awkwardness and overcome it. Try to think of the date as an interaction with an old friend. Say what's on your mind, with appropria...

 Finding someone to date isn't always easy. Here are some tips I think would be helpful in the dating world. Be honest and clear. State your intentions as soon as possible. Whether you're into casual dating or you're looking for something serious- let the person you're talking to know. If not, you're going to try decipher what texts mean like the confused math lady meme . Source:https://www.reddit.com/r/MemeRestoration/comments/ejcvd3/confused_math_lady_4080x2663px/ Don't expect to find the right one quickly.  There's going to be more bad than good dates. It's good to take it date by date and build some patience. The right one will find you. Be open to online dating. Online dating can be weird and almost dehumanizing. Nonetheless, it's worth a shot. Dating is a numbers game and dating sites will increase your chances at finding someone. At the very least, online dating will allow you to learn what qualities to NOT look for in a person. Know your wort...

Being in an interabled relationship has been challenging for me since I've had to learn to not only do things for myself, but also to help do things for my boyfriend. Here are things that I do and what has helped me do these things efficiently: Food Since my boyfriend has high functioning cerebral palsy, he's able to make simple things like sandwiches. Meals that don't require reaching the stove or microwave. His movement is limited. A simple way that we address this situation is by buying or making easily re-heatable foods. This way, it takes less time on me, for example, if I'm on my way to work. It's also generally the most convenient option. Getting the wheelchair  The physical work I put in into the relationship is more when we have to carry around the manual wheelchair. While most of the time it's relatively easy to lift, when I do have trouble lifting it- I make sure to lift with the proper positioning. Aka, not my back. There will be times where, for exa...

For this post, I want to get a bit more serious. Here are a few things to keep in mind when you and your partner get angry at each other: Remember that you're fighting against the problem, not your significant other Often times, it's hard not to take things personally. It's important to remember that there's always a reason behind someone's words and/or actions. It's a good to try to understand not only why your partner did something, but also their thought process behind it. That way, you can get a feel for their actions and in turn, understand where your significant other is coming from. Then, you can identify the true problem and have an idea on how to tackle it. If you need head space, take it One might think that leaving the room where the argument took place is bad, but it's sometimes the best thing you can do. I know for me, if I get very heated in an argument- the emotions and anger cloud my judgement. If my boyfriend attempts to talk it over immedia...

This post is one where I'll provide a few tips on what I feel I've learned about and hope will be useful to your relationship.  Expect to not understand their disability to the fullest extent As much as someone can tell you about their condition, you'll never truly know exactly how or what they feel. For example, my boyfriend has high functioning cerebral palsy. Although he can get up from his wheelchair and walk around, this is extremely tiring for him. His reach is even limited. This took me a while to learn. I thought "if he can get up and grab things, why can't he do things like this and that?" It wasn't until I saw him attempting to do these things, that I understood how hard it was for him. It's best to really be communicative and understanding when learning the capabilities of your partner. Ask questions To understand how much of what your significant other can do, it's extremely important to ask questions. When I first got together with my...

In the words of the ever so influential 2000's rock singer Avril Lavigne, we really were just a boy and a girl. Two people just maneuvering through life. Next thing we knew we were telling each other we couldn't imagine ourselves without one another.  Here's how my boyfriend and I came together: It all started last year around the month of December. We met on an online dating site. This shy, yet calm and collected guy made the decision to message me. Right off the bat- we got along really well. When we had our first phone call, I was blown away. Through the kind of conversations we had and even with the way he spoke, my attractions grew. He was respectful, kind, funny, communicative, and honest. All of the qualities I was looking for in a potential partner. There was one last thing I needed though. To actually see what he looked like! The photo he had on his profile showed his body but not his face. No matter how much I asked; this (then) mystery man would refuse to reveal ...